Little Did I Know Then ...

The phone rang. When I answered it, I heard the voice of one of the boys Todd had gone sledding with. "Mrs. Heitsch, there's been a terrible accident." "What, did Todd get hurt on the sled?" I asked. "No" was his only reply. There was a long pause. "Where are you?" I started to feel half sick. "We're on County Road 81 near Zoar."

I had no idea where County Road 81 was. We had only lived in the area for a little while. I thought Todd and the boys were going sledding in town on Dice Hill. How did they get out in the country?

I called Bill at work. I didn't have a car since Bill had one and Todd had the other. Bill would need to find County Road 81. Bill told his office girl, Wendy, what I had said. Wendy knew exactly where County Road 81 was. I called Shannon, who was visiting her friend Amanda who lived across the street. I told her she would need to come home and watch Brandon. I told her, "Something has happened to Todd."

I started to do what I normally did when I was upset; I got the vacuum out and began to clean.

Amanda called her mom, Judy, at work, and she came home. Judy came running over to the house. Judy suggested we go to the hospital. She was sure they would take Todd there if he was hurt; I agreed and jumped into her car. Judy dropped me off at the Emergency Room door, and she parked the car.

When I walked into the Emergency Room, I didn't recognize anyone I knew, but everyone seemed to know me when I gave my name. At once, all eyes were on me. Then just as suddenly, everyone's eyes dropped to the floor. Not realizing it, I'm sure, their heads began to shake in a negative motion. The clincher came when I was not asked how I planned to pay, but rather if I would please wait in a small room where the doctor would come and talk with me.

Judy came rushing in after parking the car, Immediately she asked, "What's going on?" I told her I knew Todd was dead. I remember her saying, "Did someone tell you that?" I said, "No, but look at how people are acting. I can certainly read body language"

The nurse came around the desk and took us to the small room to wait. The doctor and Bill walked into the room about the same time; I looked up. I don't remember what the doctor actually said, but I was right; Todd was dead.

When I heard the doctor's words, instantly everything seemed to be covered with a haze. I sat staring into space. After a few minutes, I got up and slowly walked out of the room. I couldn't believe this was happening. I felt like I was watching this sad scene playing out in front of me, but I wasn't a part of it.

As we walked towards the Emergency Room door, I saw people I knew who worked at the hospital. The news that Todd had died must have spread. I saw several kind-hearted people, but I said nothing. You never know how you will react when tragedy strikes. I thought I would have screamed and yelled; I did neither.

We drove home in silence. I walked into the house in a daze. I stood at the kitchen sink where the now thawed chicken still sat. "This must be some kind of a nightmare! I can't believe this is happening! This is not true! I won't believe it!" These words were screaming in my brain.